Feeling blue

Friday morning. First, let me say "Happy Canada Day" to my friends north of our borders. I wish I lived closer so that I could hop over the border for festivities today and then hop back for Independence Day festivities here in our country on Monday. However, as I am about 30 miles from our southern border, I shall have to limit my celebrating to my own country's party this weekend. Shame that.

Also a shame is the fact that my walk with Ang had to be postponed from last night. Not only that, but my cell phone just cut out as we were talking, too! Oh, the indignity!

The TPC is mired in doldrums, as am I, generally. I feel this simmering fear/unhappiness just barely below the surface of my life and I've been eating my way through it. Add to that the fact that I've not done any sort of activity since Sunday and you've got an ugly picture. Water is not what it ought to be, either, as is evidenced by the fact that my fingers look like tight, red sausages. I have to say, however, I've not been doing the "beat myself up" thing, which is positive, but perhaps not when I'm damaging my health with my current behavior. The saving grace is the fact that I'll be at the spa for a week and will have to eat properly while being presented with lots of opportunities for activities that are diverse and fun. If I can't get this thing turned around before then, at least I'm guaranteed eight days on plan. Eight days ought to be enough to put me on the right path again, right? Gosh, I hope so.

I don't want to turn this site into one long kvetch about TCB and I, so I think I'm going to have to start another journal just for me to get all of the junk inside my head about this relationship out. Lately, I've been sounding like one of those girls who just hangs on every nuance of interaction with her significant other and I don't want to be that girl. If you'd like to follow the saga of TCB and Denise, I'll add a permanent link to my left nav bar.

Comments

Anonymous said…
Oh Denise! A spa week! Lucky you - and it possibly couldn't have come at a better time. Baby steps, you'll get there :)
Shannin said…
I think a week away might help you get back on track and get some perspective on some things. I'm sure you'll come back with a new outlook on what is going on with your life right now.

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