Keep the drama for your mama

Sunday afternoon. Alrighty then! I just checked in from TCB's condo and realized the drama that I unleashed with my last post. This is totally not what I want here or anywhere, for that matter. I indulged myself in a moment of self-doubt where I allowed myself to be hijacked by my emotions and I wrote a post at that moment, which I pretty much knew was wrong as I was doing it. It's funny, really, because I was listening to Marianne Williams on the way up here this morning and she talked about this very topic and I remember thinking, "Hmmm, that's what I did with my post." We live and we learn.

Here's what's important - everyone's entitled to their opinion and no one else's opinion can change how I feel about myself without my permission. So, I choose to take what everyone has said as a sign of their caring about what happens to me and, as such, I'm going to say "thank you" and move on. (Leslie and I have corresponded and we're square.)

Let's all take a moment and be glad that we live in a society where we can have our own thoughts and express them freely without fear of reprisals. Let freedom ring.

p.s. No binges yet today. I had a full-fat Denver omelet this morning with fruit (only ate half of each) and sliced tomatoes for breakfast and 6" turkey sandwich at Subway with low fat mayo accompanied by a chocolate chip cookie for lunch. Again, this is what I want for myself. I feel nauseated with the low blood sugar right now but that's the way it goes as I wean myself off of huge amounts of food. Hopefully, if I'm able to keep it together for a week, that nausea will go away. Once that happens, I can start my cardio. Regular cardio, reasonable amounts of reasonably healthy food, plus water and relaxation/flexibility and we'll see where it gets me. This is what I can commit to forever and I'd rather be stably overweight (not obese) without yo-yoing than be untrue to myself.

This new path is uncomfortable for me, too. I've lived my life by all of the dieting "rules" and this is where it's gotten me. Gloria has said that this path will take three years to get me to my natural weight and that it will be a permanent state when I get there. I trust her and I'm giving it a chance. I'll ask you guys to do the same.


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