Lose weight overnight!

Thursday afternoon. Just a quick post to tell you about the easiest way to lose weight I've ever found: sob hysterically, with your entire body wracked with pain and your voice screaming, for 30 minutes. Yes, friends, I can tell you from real life experience that you can lose up to six pounds just from reaching the lowest point your soul can endure!

Seriously, I weighed myself yesterday morning and again with Gloria after one of the worst crying jags I've ever had, and I'd lost six pounds. When I told Gloria that it had to be the scale, she told me that the sadness and tension I'd been holding back (along with the tears and wailing lamentations) is stored in tissues and actually makes me weigh more. I don't know about you, but I'm going to work crying hysterically into my daily routine from now on!

(I'm kidding about that last part, but it is sort of spooky/interesting, huh? I ate like a horse all day yesterday, so don't think that it could be a legitimate loss. Also, Aunt Flo is nowhere near her monthly visit, so it's not that, either.)


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